At this stage in the game Im not really that old. So I’m trying to figure out why I’m creaking so much. Oh yeah, I remember now, I beat the shit out of my body over the years. It’s now starting to catch up with me. There have been too many years of carrying bags and thing’s that are bigger than me. Too many years of “I’ll do it myself” have caught up to me. I’m short in stature and not one to ask for help very often…Ok almost never do I ask for help.

My body creaks now before I even swing my legs over the side of the bed. I sit up and circle my ankles and point and flex my feet, hoping that it wont be so painful when I stand up. It doesn’t work the pain is still there. As I sat this morning snuggled into the couch with my cup of coffee looking for a sign or a feeling of what I want to put down in these lines, I take a deep breath and listen.

My mind takes me back to the days of back breaking work on the sail boats and charter yachts where the work days were longer that most people could ever handle. You just do it though because its the job and it needs to get done. I breathe in this morning and remember the days of getting up at un-Godly hours to get things ready for the day so the client can be cared for and pampered in ways unimaginable.

I was younger then and only knew to work hard and get the job done. So that’s what I did. I find myself back in a situation of working those damn 18 hour days. How does that happen. I’m just too stubborn to realize the body doesn’t function like it used to.The pain that I feel in my wrist and elbow joints is from carrying heavy bags of provisions or ice across small island roads.

My feet, now sore from wearing no shoes on tile floors across my house. Tile, because its cooler and its easier to clean. It will be me who cleans the floor so this all taken into consideration. However my feet are talking back to me now. They are screaming, Why? Ugh, what was I thinking?

All of that shit was heavy. I used to pulled up anchors for boats that didn’t have a helping hand from the push of a button on the foredeck. Would I have it any other way, probably not. I am sure feeling it today though. As I breathe in the morning and feel what I have done to my body over the years I probably wouldn’t change anything. Im a doer and always will be.

I do dream though of a day when things will be done for me. You know, before I even think of picking up something heavy, its already done. Its just a dream but maybe if I think about it every morning it will come to pass. Until then I will circle my ankles and and point and flex my toes and take these morning breaks to give my self the time it needs to get ready for the day. Sort of like priming the pump