You never know what the day will bring. I barely got up this morning (stayed up late so I slept late) when I get a call from someone to whom I am no longer speaking, but she called anyway to tell me of some robberies that happened last night. After I hung up with her it wasn’t 30 seconds later that the National Police came barrelling down my street and on to my yard. Now, anyone who knows me, knows that I hate it when people drive on my grass. Especially in rainy season. So my focus was the grass and not what they were doing here. I mean it, Stay Off My Grass. They were hunting for bad guys.
Apparently 4 men in black (no not Tommy Lee or my man Will or I would be out hunting them for myself) robbed two different houses by gun point, inside our” guarded” gated community. I’m sure that was no fun. It was the same kind of no fun that happened when a guy came looking for me one night and got my guests instead. Ooooohhh, I was pissed off, cuz nobody messes with my guests. I am very protective over anyone staying in my home. I think I did more searching that night than the security guy did.
Yeah that’s right me my flash light and my longest machete in my PJ’s (which I don’t fully wear until something like this happens then I gotta scramble to get some bottoms on so my ass ain’t hanging out to the world and all to see). I dont have guns in my house. Nor do I want them. I am too apt to use a gun quickly(not really, but I would like to think I would). Maybe I am just a five foot two squat little blonde, but inside I am a seven foot tall bad ass warrior who is not only bullet proof but is invisible when she wants to be (insert giggle here).
Okay where was I…so any way the neighbors got robbed in a bad way and the bad guys are still out there. Now may I remind you that this is jungle. There are loads of places to hide here. Not to mention if they have the cooperation of the security guys they have it easy. By the way ,did I mention that the security guys didn’t make the rounds last night? It is so wild west in this country. Hmmmm its gets curiousor and curiousor.
Picture this scene…the National Police come barrelling down my road to catch the bad guys and save the day. Only when they came to save the day they drove up on my grass and that was the first bad move. Do Not Drive On The Grass! I have to keep telling the rescuers to get off the grass. Its almost comical. No,wait, it is comical. Should I be scared, maybe, but remember the warrior in side me. I get mad first and forget to be scared. So by the time I remember to get scared its too late the thrill is gone.
The bad guys are still out there I can feel them. This is thick jungle and they are laying low. I will be staying in and writing about their sorry asses today. The funny thing is, if they did come here, I ain’t got no money. Electronics you say, well good luck with that too. If you could see my lap top you would pee yourself laughing and then send me a check out. It is being propped up by a wine rack and has scotch tape at the hinges to hold in the screws that are still remaining. Oh yeah and there is a key board but its external and the mouse is internal. Just try to move it and that would be the end of days for the Dell piece of crap that it is.
Just a thought I do have my pendulums though, and maybe I would pull those out and make like I’m some sort of witch and put a spell on them. Oh better yet maybe get some Vood Doo dolls from Nawlins. Never mind I am not messin with that stuff. It might circle around and bite me on my ass. So that’s the excitement for the day bad guys in the jungle in panama…nothing new. To live here you must have a sense of adventure. At this rate i will never run out of material.